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I am happy there is someone who can respond to my curiosity and answer to queries in the path of Siddha Yoga.
I am a practitioner of Siddha Yoga for last 15 years. My Guru is my father who had taken Siddha Yoga Deeksha from a Sadhvi (female sadhu who has renounced the worldly life) in Gujarat in 1980. After seeing my curiosity my father gave me Siddha Yoga Deeksha at home. Initially I had many Kriyas like shaking, Swaying of body, Kpakpana (vibrations), Kumbhak (pause in every breath), Rechak (exhaling air) and Hath Yoga began happening involuntarily. But because of my education I could not pay much attention towards the Sadhana (spiritual practice) and I left it after 2 years.
Since past 15 years I started Siddha Yoga again and the Kriya Yoga started where I left years back. But this time Maa Kali Mantra (mystic divine words formula) started happening on its own during Dhyan (meditation). The Mantra I chant is “OM Rhim Klim Chamunday Vicche”. Various Mudras (gesture or position, usually of the hands) and Kumbhak happen rapidly on every Vowel and Consonant of Mantra, and the continuity Persists.
After the Mantra Yoga (Maa Kali Mantra above) I start making various sounds like that of Lion, Damru (power drum), dog and sometimes elephants. Then I enter into a bizarre sexual experience. Hsthmathun (Masturbation) starts happening on its own and stops before the ejaculation (ejection of semen or orgasm). Thereafter, I don’t have any sexual desire to carry it further. Then I literally experience the blissful feeling. I see a round Sun in various colors. Sometimes a glowing or black spot emerges at the center of the colorful sun, it grows and disappears. Then I get a feeling of extreme peace that spreads all around me. I never know how long I remain in that blissful Samadhi state. After a while, when the consciousness returns, I experience a feeling of intoxication (drunkenness - not being in my senses) in my eyes. Feeling of intoxication disappears after sometime and then I get back to my routine.
Sir, after telling my experiences, I would like to understand the meaning of this and have my doubts resolved about the events in the meditation.
Chetanakan (Name changed), India |
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Here are my views about your strange Kriya experience (of masturbation) during Siddha Yoga meditation:
The way you have described it I have no doubt in my mind that this is just another Kriya experience of Siddha yoga. Since this Kriya is sexual experience it may sound strange for you or anyone else, but there is nothing absurd or un-natural about it when you understand the scientific reason behind the Kriyas.
Let me first explain basics about Kriyas (called spiritual experiences) in the path of Siddha Yoga.
Involuntary Kriyas are integral part of Siddha Yoga
Kriya, in simple words, can be called as natural involuntary movements or actions that happen after Kundalini awakening and continue for several decades during meditation. Kriyas are spontaneous movements resulting from the awakening of Kundalini as this intense energy (Prana) moves through 72,000 Nadis (subtle energy channels carrying Prana) and clears our spiritual and physiological blocks. Kriya are an integral part of Kundalini Yoga. Kriya will be different during each phase of spiritual development.
The world of Yogic Kriyas is a phenomenon absolutely beyond human imagination. There are 125,000 types of Kriyas or Spiritual Experiences The sole purpose of divine experiences during meditation is cleaning of physical body (Sthula Sharira) and subtle body (Linga Sharira) and cleaning of past Karma impressions (Sanchita Karma) from the Casual body (Karan Sharira). In short consider the Kriyas (experiences) as "Zadu" or Broom ...nothing more. All experiences will entirely depend on the "spiritual status" (combination of Sanchita Karma, Samskaras and Tri-Gunas) of the Sadhak.
Masturbation appears to be just another Kriya to clean your Chakra/Nadi pathways (in your case)
In my view, your experience of masturbation is just one of the 125,000 Kriyas that can happen to seeker during Siddha Yoga meditation. I remember one of the seekers had mentioned to me long time back, about a book where the Siddha Sadhak had similar sexual experiences of masturbation during his meditation. Eventually they all stopped when he moved on to the next phase in his spiritual journey.
So, in my view, there is nothing to get worried aver the masturbation you are experiencing in Dhyan as long as it is happening on its own (spontaneously) without your initiation or action. The Kriya is occurring to clear some of your leftover past Karma impressions within spiritual body.
I would think eventually this Kriya will stop happening to you when the particular Chakra/Nadi pathway has been cleaned to expected extent (where Prana can travel freely in that area.) There is no one who can tell you when this Kriya would stop (except an enlightened one may be), but I am pretty sure it will stop after clearing the impressions from your Karma body. So, in simple words, when the purpose of this Kriya is over it will not happen anymore. That time you may experience some different Kriya, hopefully it will not be like this one.
After my explanation of Kriyas, if you feel that is not the case of a Kriya you may want to get psychological help.
Hope this help.
Thank you.
Mahendra Joshi
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